Sex Sells, But Not During the Super Bowl: PETA’s Adverse History with Super Bowl Commercials

By Joanne Kong

Twitter: @kongfu4u  Super Bowl Commercials

We’ve all heard of PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment for Animals).

With more than three-million members and supporters, they’re known for their ‘shock and awe’ campaigns to get our attention regarding humane treatment for animals.  In the past, their activists threw red paint on fur donning citizens.  More recently, they’ve used humans to demonstrate the cruelty of eating animals by comparing animal flesh to human flesh.  In July of 2010, Peta demonstrated on Broadway with ‘Human Meat Trays.’  The saddest part was the guy was only valued at $1.59 a pound.  Maybe this wasn’t the point for this spectacle, but that’s crazy cheap for meat.

And as another example, last July, they called for Walter Palmer to be ‘hanged’ for killing Cecil the Lion.

But PETA is known for so much more.  They started a campaign stating that cow milk was linked to autism.

They’ve sued Whole Foods on their ‘organic certification.’

They’ve sued on behalf of a monkey (who took a selfie of himself) for copyright claims.  I doubted the monkey really cared.

The list goes on and on since the organization was first established in March 1980.

But, the campaign doesn’t just stop at demonstrations and law suits.

As you know, to capture the attention of millions, advertisers paid five-million dollars for 30 second Super Bowl commercials this year.  An ideal platform for advertisers, and PETA is no different.  PETA has been trying to advertise during the Super Bowl for the past seven years, and has been rejected every time.  I can understand why some of the submitted ads would not be allowed.  The Super Bowl is watched by millions, and some of those included millions are children.  Parents wouldn’t be too happy about PETA teaching their children about sex through a major television event.  No, seriously, PETA had a sex add it wanted to air during Super Bowl 50.

But if you’re trying to remember through your nacho and beer induced haze why it is you don’t remember that ad during the Super Bowl, it’s because it was banned.  In fact, the commercial was said to be flat out ignored when submitted earlier this year to CBS.

But that didn’t stop PETA from trying to get their message across.  Thank goodness for the internet.  What would organizations like PETA do to spread their message if YOUTUBE didn’t exist.  They might not have gotten as many viewers as compared to being broadcasted during Super Bowl 50, but it did get over two-million views, and for a lot less than five-million dollars.  Oh, you want to see it, you say?  Because you’re a conscientious human being, of course, not because you’re a perv?  Well, here it is!

2016 – Last Longer

(Warning: Adult Content)

The Message: Not only can vegans perform longer and better satisfy their partners, but finishing early could kill you.  Now if that ain’t frightening, I don’t know what is.

The real question though is: “Would men become vegan to better satisfy their partners or to live longer lives?”  Feel free to disagree, but I’m leaning towards “no” on that one.

But regardless, the look of disappointment in the video was priceless.  Maybe it should have been a Mastercard commercial.

Want a few more examples of NSFW PETA commercials targeted for past Super Bowls?  Of course you do!

4 years ago – The appeal of Cow Milk?

The answer? There’s no appeal.

7 Years ago – Meat Can Causes Impotence

Filmed as a seventies porno scene, a pizza delivery man arrives carrying a large sausage pizza, and from the package in his short hot pants, he’s assumed to be carrying a lot more than pizza…only to disappoint.  Well, I’m sure the pizza was good at least.

The following two commercials don’t relate to the sexual prowess of vegans, but they were ignored just the same when submitted.

7 years ago – KFC Torture Camp

This wasn’t the first or last campaign against the Colonel.  It might have been too brutal for children to see.  You know, like Janet Jackson’s wardrobe malfunction 12 years ago.  That was pretty brutal to see too.  And, I suspect the Super Bowl wouldn’t want to take on the wrath of the colonel and his Army.

***

Say what you will about PETA, but they sure know how to shock.  Heck, perhaps the Super Bowl commercials can use a little shake up now and again.  But seriously, I’m thinking a Super Bowl audience that typically consumes 1.3 billion chicken wings over the course of a day might not be the best target audience for PETA.  You would think that super powered vegans would know better than that.  Just sayin.

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